My work lately has been turning more and more stressful and demanding and it has changed my need for yoga, at least at this point in time.

Because the office demands a lot of focus, time-pressured deadlines, micro-managing situations, I find myself always hurrying here and there, eating later than usual, stressing out, and breathing in shallowly. At the end of the day, my body craves recharging and I find myself no longer looking forward as much as before to intense yoga sessions where more demands would be made of my already tired body.

I want to go at my own pace and not have to keep up with the rest of the class. I miss the moments of meditation that we used to have which calmed me prior to starting my asanas. I just want to breathe in and out for as long as I wish to, not hurried, no time limits.

Just back to basics — at least for a while.

Today, I went to the gym. I had the room all to myself. I must have spent 15 minutes in quiet meditation, breathing in and out as deeply as I could, clearing my mind, projecting positive feelings, letting go of my office concerns. I could feel the tired areas of my body being slowly renewed with just my breath. Then, as I began the asanas, I spent time on each pose, adjusting and deepening whenever I could but becoming more aware of how my body was responding to each type of asana. Whenever I felt inflexibility in joints that once were flexible (during my more regular yoga days), I would go only as far as I could, then let go, accepting that this was my body’s present limitation. I set my own pace according to what my body could do, counting slowly, holding as long as possible, deepening whenever I could, easing up when I couldn’t.

For now, I wish to listen to my body and what it needs; and I am incorporating once again some form of meditation as part of it. I want to learn more about yoga techniques that incorporate the breath as part of the detoxification process.

Until my project eases up, I foresee more hours on self yoga than in in-class workouts. But I think that if I am able to spend more time meditating and breathing deeply, I can go back to work the next day better prepared to tackle its demands.